When you always wished for more time.

Remember that moment or moments you said, "I wish I had more time to do these things" or " I really want to do that but I just don't have the time." I feel like that has been a regular comment I have made over and over throughout the years.

For many of us that wish has now been granted. Thousands of us are now home due to the COVID-19. The impact of this pandemic has been surreal. For those of us that live a life of go, go, go, this especially has been an interesting transition. The first three weeks for me were challenging. I would have anxiety building up in my chest regularly because of the feeling of inadequacy, lack of productivity (that's mostly in my head), and a small loss of purpose, which leaves me feeling a bit less well, of myself. Also, this got me thinking of pursuing a second career path to ensure a position that will always be needed or in demand. A change of mindset has happened so very quickly. Who would have ever thought this would have happened in their lifetime? Not me. But, and I said but, even this has a silver lining. A HUGE silver lining that I am so grateful for. This time is an unexpected gift to rediscover yourself, your family, your community and so much more.

Because of my nature I have not experienced what people call "boredom" yet. I can always find things to keep me busy, especially with a house, family, business and large ass yard! Trying to get the kids up and see the light of day, do their school work (even if it is in their bed) and get some kind of activity in can be challenging, especially with the teens. Were working through it though, with a lot of breathing techniques. With that said it has also been so awesome. The time we are spending together would be impossible unless this happened and I am so grateful for the memories and experiences we have already created. Think about it, your kids are totally forced to be with you alllll the time! When your a parent of teens that can be the most miraculous phenomenon to take place! I have been adding elements to my website and working on behind the scene products and services for when I can get that part of my heart back and capture images of my amazing clients again. Super excited about that! Getting invloved in photography workshops online, working out everyday, going on walks, practicing calligraphy (15-20 min increments is all I can handle), trying yoga, growing in my spiritual faith, almost building a vegetable garden, teaching my daughter dance, projects with my guy, playing with our new rabbits, trying to appear on my kids Tik Toks and cooking, cooking, cooking...wait, did I mention cooking?!! I mean like, homeade dishes and bread from scratch! Feeling like a fricken' superstar mom right now! By the end of this, I think a trophy may be in order! One shaped like a bottle of sweet Moscato please (side note for my family). If you are looking for an amazing and easy banana bread recipe, let me know!

I actually envy those who have finished a personal book or two so far, watched a season of their favorite show, or slept more. I put a bit of that on my bucket list. For me, home is an especially hard place to "let go" and am sure I am not the only one with this issue I hope right? I love being home and finding moments to chill, but it does not take long before thoughts of chores or guilt sets in and I am up and on a roll again. Like many, I need to really work on this. Well, the time requested is here, and even though it is financially extremly scary, you gotta smile, have faith, and just embrace it to the best of your ability! Can I get a Hallelujah! The statement; "I don't have the time", has been surprisingly put on hold for little while.

My baby girl is loving reading and watching her show s in bed .

Last week, I realized that the only way I have ever really been able to relax and read a book or be still for longer periods of time were in situations where I did not feel a sense of anything needing to be done around me. The only place I can recall being able to achieve this over the past few years is on a beach next to calming waters. Recognizing this, a decision was made to train myself to find more of a balance in my life. Not that I haven't been trying, but definitely not putting it at the top of the list. Mental, physical, and spiritual health are not always so easy to obtain when we have so many distractions, stresses and responsibilities.

So, guess what awesome thing I did! I bought a baby pool! Yes, a baby pool! On Easter Sunday, after having our delicious no rush brunch and egg hunt this mama was ready!  I filled the pool with water, grabbed a book I have been attempting to finish for almost a year now, made sure I had a bottle of water and a mimosa for celebratory sakes, tossed in some ducks for realism, threw on my suit and sat. It took a moment but by the end of two chapters, my body and mind fell into a zen like coma. It was magical. It was inspiring. Thank you Jesus, Target, the birds who serenaded me and the warm sun for showing me how to be in the now and chill.

The way our world has adapted many of us to think is that without working in some fashion regularly or all the time, we are useless. Dead weight per se. This pandemic has forced everything to SLOW down. When things slow down your senses tend to heighten. That tree you walked by 50 times to get a work out in before the kids got up for school somehow now looks different. It is magically detailed in color and rich in texture. Neighbors you never even knew lived on the same street as you are appearing and saying hello! These people you would have otherwise never met with the schedule you typically carry. A déjà vu feeling of old school neighborhood vibes and family values have been coming back in literally just 4 weeks. An awakening is taking place people, for so many us.

The environment is showing dramatic changes and improving (even my succulents are growing!), families are spending more time together, business' are figuring out that allowing employees to work from home can be beneficial and productive, kids that struggle with school are all of a sudden excelling due to a more relaxed schedule and distance from unnecessary social struggles (home school is showing not as bad as some thought it would be... even I am surprised), people are appreciating things that they always did just a bit more now that they can't, and finally we are learning what is really truly needed in this life, and what is not. Like, toilet paper.

So in closing, I have this massive yard. Bushes line the entire outside perimeter along with trees and weeds that I always wanted to work on. Well, I am on week four and this sucker is half way there (silver lining)! I may be overdoing it a bit on the trimming but hey, gardening is therapeutic right? My poor bald bushes. I am going to get back to it now cause it's gonna take more than one quarantine to finish it! Holding a drink while working may be starting to slow me down a bit but hey, no need to rush anything right? Not a big drinker, but feelin' like "why not", right now. Use this time to grow in every area of your life you can, embrace it, and don't worry, this too shall pass. Focus on the positives and give yourself a schedule everyday which includes indulging in something you never have the time to do normally. Your mind, body and spirit can be fed so much right now. Together we will all come out stronger! I look forward to connecting with you all and capturing your love again soon! Miss your smiles and amazing hearts! Perspective is everything. Make the best of this time and have fun creating memories, relax, have a cup of tea or glass of something, schedule a zoom date and stay home please.

Wine courtesy of nakedwines.com

Cheers!

Tanya Santos

Barefeet and Boots Photography

P.S. If your looking for a new family game to play together and are not a sensitive group, you have to try THROW THROW BURRITO! I mean, haven't we all at some point wanted to throw a burrito at someone before??? Especially the ones your sheltering at home with? It was hilarious and felt great!